Repair-It

I have a net worth of over four million (USA) dollars. That's not "rich" to many people, but it suits me.

I love being a stealth millionaire. I live in a home that I purchased for $240,000 (that's because houses are expensive here...in many areas of the country, my house would be worth half that much). My neighborhood is very middle-class. I drive a Nissan, and my wife drives a Honda. We buy our cars new (with cash), but we keep them for approximately ten years. Not a soul, other than my wife, knows what we have. When we die, our children will very likely be quite shocked.

I fix virtually everything that breaks. We shop at the Dollar store. Our favorite restaurant is In-N-Out. Ninety percent of the time, I wear jeans and a black "polo" shirt (non-branded). People have commented on my limited wardrobe, but I don't care -- because I don't stink, and some of these commenters have a negative net worth!

OK, now here's the fun part. I never worry about money. I can buy anything I want (except jets, yachts, and ridiculous houses, I feel). Luckily, I enjoy a $10 purchase as much as many people enjoy their $10,000 purchases -- probably a lot more, because I'm not worried about making payments. Everyday expenses, utility bills, insurance, gasoline costs, and medical bills don't concern me. Though I do "shop around" -- even on things like toilet paper.

I have never worried about whether I could pay a bill. If I need $500,000 in cash tomorrow, I can get it out of the bank. I enjoy walking into a car dealership every ten years, and writing a $27,000 check for a middling car. Their jaws always drop, because I don't look like I have twenty bucks in my Walmart jeans, and they see my ten-year-old car sitting outside (the one I'll sell myself, not trade in).

Travel costs don't concern me -- and we travel a lot (frugally, I might add). People wonder "where-do-you-get-the-money-because-you-don't-look-rich."

I enjoy seeing people in public who are acting like big shots, or pretending to be rich (they are so easy to spot). They have NO idea!

I should mention that I achieved my wealth by working in a non-managerial position in a corporation for 29 years. While I was paid well, I never made more than $130,000 until the last four years of my career (I'm retired now). I didn't inherit anything, and I enlisted in the military after high school. So much for my “privilege.”

I read so many questions where people ask how to "get rich." The key for me was frugal living, a decent education, careful saving and investing, avoidance of get-rich-quick schemes, and 33 years of work (including military service). Sounds awfully boring, but it's the truth.

There is a contingent of people (sometimes nasty) on Quora that believe you have to inherit money, or "get lucky" in some way in order to become financially independent. Or, being greedy, they spend all their time thinking about a quick billion, when a million or so might work (almost) as well. The trouble is, they think all rich people live like basketball stars, when in fact, the vast majority of self-made millionaires don't live anything like that.

My dad is worth in the mid-high eight figures. He grew up slightly wealthy, but on his own has built and sold a few businesses from scratch. My siblings and I are all highly educated and hard working and are on the same path. Few people know the extent of our wealth. My nuclear family is very open about it, but other than bankers/accountants, nobody is aware. My parents are very intent on being stealthy. A few examples:

- I grew up in a very modest house in a modest part of town. When my siblings and I left for college, my parents sold their already small house and moved into a ~1000 sf apt.

- My dad has driven the same model of compact car for the last 20 years. He leases them and gets the same model/color when it is up. He was angry when superfluous features like air conditioning, power windows, automatic transmission became standard.

- My dad often wears *my* old Gap/Old Navy jackets. He hates shopping for clothes and will wear them down until they are tattered.

As others have pointed out, the modest tastes aren't meant to keep us grounded and don't feel like a facade. It's just who we are.. The wealth is incidental.

My family spends its money on a few things.. mostly being together. We usually gather at least a couple of times a year somewhere fun.

My parents are also very generous in their support of causes they believe in: education, health care, arts, etc. Of course it's all done anonymously.

I usually smile when people talk about how wealthy they are, or more commonly, how lavishly they spend their money. I would venture that there are many others like us.


***EDIT*** Not directly related to the topic, but it does speak to our motivations for being stealthy.

Just wanted to reply to Andrea Teale's comment specifically, and to the general notion that wealthy people are hoarding money. Unfortunately this is a common misunderstanding of our banking system and of capitalism... It is also this belligerence that leads many wealthy to want to be anonymous. I'm not going to bore you with a thorough explanation of why this is wrong, but there are three things you need to keep in mind right off the bat:

1) Often much of this wealth is illiquid. This means that a wealthy individual's assets are tied up in the companies that he/she have created. One cannot simply turn these into cash and hand it out... especially when we're talking about smaller businesses that are not public. I suppose you could just give your business to the government/a charity, but this would represent a destruction of societal value. Jobs would be lost and the services you enjoy would not be produced.

2) Most significantly this view represents a massive misunderstanding of capitalism. Very few wealthy people (or non-wealthy for that matter) just park their money under their mattresses. It is virtually always invested. What does this mean?
-One of the closest equivalents to 'hoarding cash', in terms of risk, is investment in bonds. However, this investment results in things like the local public school system being able to afford to build a new building, cities being able to repair or renew their infrastructure, and the federal government being able to fund things like health-care program expansion.
-Or on the riskier side, wealthy individuals frequently invest in startups. These investments are central to capitalism functioning well and provide people from all levels of society the ability to move up the socio-economic spectrum. They are also responsible for innovation, and helping you receive better health-care, better access to people around the world (i.e. Quora).
-Sometimes the wealthy keep their money in cash in banks. However, yet again, the reality here is that 'hoarding' is not occurring. Banks lend the money you have deposited out to others. This means that you can get a mortgage to buy a house, or have a credit card or pay for college. It also means that businesses can borrow money to expand operations and potentially create new jobs.

You could argue all of this capital should be seized by the government, but history has shown pretty resoundingly that governments are very poor at allocating capital. There may be less inequality (government officials not-withstanding), but everyone will be worse off. History is clear here.

Also: See the copious amounts of research on money multipliers and the velocity of money to get a more complete picture.

3) The only educated argument you could start with is that sometimes this system leaves some behind. For example, it would be hard to argue that people in Somalia (to use your example) can elevate themselves out of poverty through sheer hard work. It's still probably possible, but I think a rational person would have a tough time saying that a hard working and smart Somali 20 year old is on the same footing as an ivy league educated, wealthy, and equally hard working and smart 20 year old in the US. We wouldn't even have to go as far as Somalia to see this. Neighborhoods around this country provide similarly dire circumstances. The problem is that for all the money that has flowed to these areas (and it has been a lot), little has really changed. Are there exogenous solutions that can be imposed? Possibly. Will these solutions require money? Probably. But the problem is there are no obvious solutions yet. The beauty of capitalism is that money follows good ideas... you just need the ideas.

Capitalism has been the single biggest success for humanitarianism. It of course isn't perfect... But it has been an unambiguously incredible force for good.

My wife and I are in our mid 40s and have a self-made net worth of over $5M USD. We live in a major, international (aka high cost) city so that amount does not afford us the luxuries that one one might imagine.

Our wealth is so low key that my wife wouldn't even know that we're rich if I didn't tell her; I manage most of our accounts and assets. Other than her and our banking relationships, no one knows. We come from solidly middle class families and have very few wealthy acquaintances. The "act" is to fool ourselves as much as anybody else. There is a sense that this can end at any time, and we should always be prepared to go back to a "normal" life. From our own personal family histories, we know that fortunes can be easily be lost through mismanagement, market downturns, disasters, war, etc.

The US is largely egalitarian on the surface so it's easy to blend in. Lower income and higher income people all have iPhones and large flat screen TVs. Easy financing allows people to buy more car than they can really afford. People can choose to rent a nice house rather than save for a down payment and buy an average house. I have observed that most people live beyond their means so there it's not hard for me to obscure my wealth by living a normal lifestyle.

The closest analogy that I can draw to being discreetly (and relatively moderately) wealthy is like having a minor superpower (e.g., being able to levitate 6 inches off the ground). It has very little impact to everyday life unless one feels need the need to show off to the world. Occasionally, it might come in handy, but for the most part it's best to keep it a secret and not draw attention to oneself. We might be able to buy a Tesla with cash but we can't afford to own a Ferrari or Aston Martin. It would also stick out like a sore thumb in our neighborhood. We can afford to travel anywhere in the world, but we would never pay for business or first class tickets or luxury suites. On the same vacation, we might stay at 4 star resort for free using points and at a backpacker's hostel.

With this minor "superpower", I also think a lot about how I can use it to benefit my family and society without revealing my identity. I can't exactly go around handing out hundred dollar bills in a cape and mask. I would love to be able to help my friends, family and colleagues achieve financial independence, but ironically I lack the credentials since I eschew the outward trappings of wealth. Would you rather get financial advice from someone who drives a Ferrari or the person who tells you that you don't need a Ferrari? I also think there is a social awkwardness to discuss finances let alone ask for advice. My more observant acquaintances do realize that I seem to have a handle on finances and will ask me for help.

Unlike others in our situation, financial freedom has not granted us actual freedom (yet). In the last few years I ended my professional career of 20 years and am focusing on managing our investments. My wife continues her career as a working professional for a large corporation. As an employee, she still needs to request "permission" for time off and our young kids still have school and activities. Even though financially we can afford to visit Paris for the weekend, in practice we cannot. What I can do is spend more time with my kids and help my ailing relatives without concern of upsetting my boss. I've been able to take a more active role in caring for my grandmother while my aunts and uncles can't get away from their jobs.

I do not feel an immense sense of relief since the wealth was accumulated steadily over a long time and through a life of delayed gratification (which we continue to practice). Without my wife's income, we would unable to support our middle/upper middle class lifestyle because we are heavily leveraged and we are still in growth mode. Many people worry about making the mortgage payment. I have 7--each larger than the average homeowner's. Our wealth is tied in up in non-liquid assets which generate very little disposable income (my rental cash flow goes back into repairs and upgrades) but hopefully will increase in value. This is by design. Generating minimal income removes the temptation to spend more and minimizes taxes. We are focused on wealth accumulation through capital appreciation.

Overall, we understand that we are extremely fortunate and hope one day to spend our money (on ourselves and society) in a manner commensurate with our paper wealth.

Ninety percent of the time, I wear jeans and a black "polo" shirt (non-branded). People have commented on my limited wardrobe, but I don't care